Most programming languages have IF/THEN statements.
Some examples include:
IF mobile phones are banned THEN there will be riots in the streets
IF you stir the shit too vigourously THEN you’ll be sure to get the shit on yourself
IF you say to your mrs that Wednesday is “hump day” THEN you’ll be sure to get a “no it isn’t” from her
IF you say “fuck off PLEASE” to someone THEN they surely will fuck off
IF you say to your mrs “Keep your knickers on” THEN she surely will – for the next year
IF you want to survive a zombie disaster, THEN colour your hair blonde
